moved:))
http://shootingstarxy.livejournal.com/

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

FIR's cd is out. 爱·歌姬 :)) there goes my 20 bucks again.

i m realli in a dilemma. my brain ask me to choose route 1 yet my heart ask me to choose route 2. should i give myself another chance again? i m totally not confident but this issue has been hanging for a damn damn damn long time and there's never a proper closure. somehow i wish it will never end but yet i know it have to. so selfish of me:((
perhaps the first thing i should do is to throw that pooh bear sleeping on my bed away. maybe that will prompt me to do what i m suppose to do.

recess week is ending. good and bad. i m so bored at home. i rather return back to school though that marks the start of my hectic life again. :) but. i m not done with my mugging and anat is on thur. shit.

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

月牙湾! nice song!!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

mixed feelings!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

:))

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

somebody's 21! :))

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

everyone around me is getting emo. name one and they are. HAIZ. mi too!:( i hate my life nw. the workload, expectation, upcoming ca and ARH everything.
i dont know why but i m always disappointing my friends. i m always pangsehing them like yesterday and today. i always say friends are my first priority other than my family, no matter how busy i m, i will always have time for them but recently this is changing. guyton, gray,martini, pbl, lab, tut seems to replace them totally. i have cleanly forgotten my friends' birthdays and i have been ignoring them as if they never exist in my life. :(
i miss youyouyouyouyouyouandyou!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

my laptop button revived all of a sudden. haha. weird.

blood pressure lesson todayy! omg. i m such a lousy student. the only thing i can ace is taking diastolic blood pressure which can be trusted. my systolic pressure is horrible. it is always an estimation. gosh. i m going to screw up my assessment. arhhh
and we saw Mstudents using our lab and we sort of had a mini tutorial with them because they were teaching some a&e stuff. omggg! a&e is damn cool!!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

my laptop button is out of order. damn. now i know fujitsu suck. :(

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

who says hungry man is an angry man? i think tired man is an angry man. oh man. i m so shagged! i have been pretty anti-social recently. :( yah, that's bad. staying home on weekends which is super weird and rejecting meetups and outings:( goshhh. what's wrong with me!
friends getting swayed.
long travelling hours. suck!
he's getting super emo for his clinical posting.
heavy bag
n i m really tired:((

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

bloggering in sch lib nw. why isnt my friend back? i need to return my boookkk! :( and i saw her...the last person i would ever want to see in my life. i think she know who m i. too me! this is bad.
but anyway. whee. i passed my driving! oh finally:))

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

whee. i m mad. haha. or stressed up in a weird way?

retail therapy in schhh! haha!! cosmetics fair~ everything is so damn cheap and they are from MAC! 2 lipsticks, 1blusher n 1 eyeshadoww. haha. i m a happy gal noww. i wan my forever 21 dress! shit. turning to a shopaholic when i m so stressed up is burning a hole in my pocket!

anyway, i think ben gave up on me. haha. can sense his *OMG, why is she so stupid* tone when he was explaining to me. arhh. cvs from what i heard is realli easy but i just dont see the link between them. arh.

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

i m depressed nw. someone i like and knew just passed away. :(( life is so unfair. arhhh:(

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

Online Videos by Veoh.com
nursing dance!!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

i miss my lappie. haha. havent been using it for quite sometime bcos i have been busying mugging cvs that stupid chapter that seems difficult but it is actually quite simple. SIGHH.
yahh! sat's quad bash. haha. dentistry, pharmacy are damn on because quite a lot of people turned up. nursing only a handful and medicine is pathetic.
dance competition. medicine gt first (expected) and nursing gt second. :)) some accomplishment.

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

:((
someone just withdrew from nursing. and now the question is, the whole of nursing is not united as a faculty and the course is tough? but i guess is just for this sem because everything is super new to us. and yah! stupid cvs lecturer. she gave us such a horrible notes and her accent is really weird. is i m not wrong, she should be the french lecturer that some of my frenz were talking abt. OMG! talkin about the notes! it's super brief that all of us ended up studying everything abt heart from medical physiology which is super super detailed and i believed there's quite a lot of unneccessary stuffs. :(
should i buy guyton? hmm..even ben thinks guyton is good! i regret buying martini!!

I thought this article was super touching!!
Touched by a nurse~

"Oh no, I wish i werent starting my psych rotation." My thoughts were racing as I entered the large conference area for orientation. "I never know what to say when someone is hurting emotionally." A group of 18 student nurses had gathered to learn our specific assignments for teh next 3 months.
" Miss Warner, you will be assigned Miss Alice Ferguson in C-632. She has been with us for over 10 years and to our knowledge, she has never communicated verbally with anyone."
"She is not violent, she just sits there all day long, day after day. Because you love to talk so much, maybe she will respond to you." As I approached C-632, I looked inside and saw a woman sitting in a well-worn chair, facing the window. I entered the room and called Miss Ferguson's name. There was no sign of recognition or acknowledgement. I spoke again-still no response. Knowing that I would have to report back on my first visit, I decided to approach my patient at a closer range. "Miss Ferguson, my name is Miss Warner, and I will be your nurse each day for the next 3 months. May I sit down?" There was still no response, only a brief glance that acknowledged she heard me. I sat there for about 5 minutes, very quiet, not moving.It came to me very gently and very quietly to just spend each day sitting by her side, and not saying a word, just present. I remained obedient to that nudge, until it was time to leave. As I stood up ready to go I said "Miss Ferguson, I am leaving now, but I will be back to spend time with you tomorrow." Her response was a brief nod of her head.
During the next week, each day I would introduce my arrival, acknowledge her presence, pull up a chair and quietly sit beside her, until it was time I would speak of my departure and remind her of my return the next day.
Each day the silence became easier to endure. During my second week, in addition to announcing my arrival, I informed Miss Ferguson that I would be with her each day, at the same designated time, and that my visits would continue for 10.5 weeks more. I also let her know that I would be open to anything she wanted to say or chose not to say, but that I would be there everyday no matter what.
The weeks passed: week2, week3, week4. Nothing seemed to change. Then on monday of the 5th week, I noticed that Alice had pulled my chair a little closer to her, with it actually facing her. I inquired if she desired me to sit in the chair as it was placed and she agained nodded slightly. "Thank you for being open to our visits, and I will continue to be here as promised each day." I was surprised to actually hear myself stating that I enjoyed the silence, me, who grew up being called "the mouth."
At the conclusion of the 5th week, without lifting her head, Alice said "thank you." I said good-bye, walked outside and began to cry. ALice had actually spoken to me. "How exciting," I thought, "I wonder what will happen during the remaining 7 weeks."
The following week Alice began to greet me with "good morning" and my departure with "goodbye," but still we spoke nothing in between. We were both feeling increasingly comfortable with our silence, and occasionally I would add a slight statement about how important my time was with her, or comment briefly about how she looked or what I saw outside the window.
One day during the 9th week, Alice looked at my directly and asked "Why do you stay with me each day?" I felt my hands tighten around the chair in surprise and with an even voice responded "because i enjoyed being with you and feel comfortable in this room." Alice looked at me again, and said "No one has ever done this before, they always leave. Thank you for staying with me." I felt my eyes begin to water. ALice responded with a smile, a beautiful smile, and i noticed she too had tears in her eyes.
"I will be with you for 3 more weeks and then my rotation is over, but I will be here each day during that time." I felt I had to be honest with her, because I knew that ALice should be aware of my remaining days with her. The next day when I arrived, i noticed Alice had out on some lipstick and pulled her hair back with a soft pink ribbon. She was lovely. I wanted to embrace her but did so mentally in respect of her privacy. "Oh Miss Ferguson, you look so lovely today, this is a special day." The words just slipped out but Alice nodded and said "Yes it is. You see, today is my 63rd birthday and I have never spent my birthday with anyone since I was 33 years old." I wanted to jump up and hug Alice, but i knew i couldnt, so i gently commented on how special it was for me as well. Alice reached out her hand and shook mine. "Thank you Miss Warner for being here with me, it means more than I can tell you." We smiled and parted closer than I had ever felt possible. The next day i brought her a single pink rose and wished her a happy birthday. As Alice reached for her rose, she started sobbing and sat down with her face buried in her hands. "Oh Miss Warner, Miss WArner," she spoke between sobs in a slow but deliberate manner. "I have never talked to anyone about this ever, but over the past week , i have grown to trust you, like i have never trusted anyone in my life."
ALice began to speak as if she needed to get everything out immediately. "It was the day after my 32nd birthday. My boyfriend has asked me to marry him. I said yes, and it was the happiest day of my life. We needed to wait until he returned from overseas duty, which would be in 1 year. I agreed and we both felt a bond of love that we knew would last forever. Two weeks later i received a message that he had been killed in a car accident. I was devastated and felt my world had come to an end. I couldnt talk to anyone and decided to keep my pain to myself. To make it even worse, i found myself pregnant. I was ashamed and embarrassed and was unable to tell anyone. I couldnt have the baby of the man who was dead, when i wasnt married. So i took a coat hanger and i caused my baby to abort, and i buried it outside my window." At this point, ALice was sobbing uncontrollably. I felt i was needed to reach out and hold her, and when i did she just clung to me and cried for a long, long time. I just held her, and quietly prayed for God's tenderness and healing presence to enfold her.
WHen she finally stopped crying, she told me that for 31 years she had held this inside her, for 31 years she had ached, and for 31 years she kept silent about her abortion and her entire life. IN essence, she never spoke again to anyone, at any time, regarding anything. SHe had been institutionalized for the past 25 years, never sharing with anyone. "For the first time, i can trust someone. You were there for me everyday and i knew you would be there for me no matter what." Alice left the hospital 2 weeks later, with the notation of a miraculous recovery. I knew that the real miracle had unfolded through the gift of listening, the blessing of trust, and the bond of sharing.

done typing! such a long article. was supposed to read this for PIP and i forgt so apparently i was reading it when the class was discussing about this article. i almost cried out after reading. :))

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

i m the joke of the day i guess. haha. knocked into the wall yesterday and i end up with a super bad bruise (swelling) in my elbow. most of my classmates laughed the moment the heard my story. :((went down to UWC and the doctor laughed after hearing how the swelling came about. was referred down to NUH A&E for xray and there the doctor laughed at me again! LOL. i m certain i m not the first and only person that knocked myself into a wall so i dont see why they should be laughing at me! ARH!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

School uniform day!
okay! i noe wearing sch uniform is damn AA but the feeling is super cool and fun!!We are just mad la. haha. but sadly, only a handful wore sch uniform. if the whole nursing were to wear it tgt, it will be damn funnn!!:((

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

i m sick of that stupid ethics quiz but i thought the articles are pretty interesting so no harm reading them! :)) they should have taught us about citation when we were in j1 so at least i dont have to suffer so much during my research period. hahaa!!
oh gosh. i m supposed to upload the photo that i took of ann looking so pretty in my f21 dress! hahaa!!
class gathering is pathetic. haha. onli 10 people came for the mini gathering. seriously, i hate steamboat in marina bay. not onli does it suck (due to their cleanliness level), that whole place just stink like hell (oil smell) and it makes me have diarrhea (for sure after the dinner)!! and because of this mini gathering, i pangseh ann n huiqi for zouk though i promised them pretty long ago! sorri gals!
as told by ben that ucla has nursing. OMG! i din noee! :( anyway, i dont think i will ever go abroad to study because i m how dependent on my parents. i will die without them and i will be super super home sickkk. yupp!

♥ there's not a place
in heaven that we cant reach

Jasmine
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